Eating Like a 5 Year Old

Slow Cooked Sweet Southern Slammin’ Sandwich (Boneless Baby Pork Rib, Caramelized Onions, Swiss cheese, BBQ Sauce)with Onion Rings

@ Mikie Squared - Hoboken - NJ

Thought this was going to be an obnoxious bar with sub-par food.  Expectations low.  Pleasantly surprised.  Sandwich was messy. BBQ-y. Filling.  Onion rings legit.  Beer selection decent.  Trivia night… way too long.  Way too many cheaters.  Getting off topic.  Yes.  Number of periods in this write-up.  13 not counting the ellipsis.  17 if you do.  Okay, 18!

The Garbanzo Extravaganza Hummus Bowl (chickpeas, cherry tomatoes, greens and lemon garlic sauce) with Falafel

@ Crisp on Wheels - West Village - New York, NY

Thoughts: Mind Blown.  I’m officially back in the falafel game.

Duck Pad Thai Lunch Special and Ice Tea

@ Sky Thai - Jersey City, NJ

Thoughts: All I remember is walkin out on John’s Pizzeria cause we were waiting for 10 minutes (possibly 5) and didn’t even get a menu, even though the place was practically dead.  Going to Sky Thai was a complete, awesome transformation… dude held the door for us, brought us menus ASAP and we literately had our lunch within 10 minutes of ordering.  Insanely happy with the food and the service.  The salad was kinda wack (just look at that tomato), but the actual food was killer.  Definitely recommend if you’re lookin for Thai in dowtown Jersey City. 

Good Morning, Sausage and Peppers.  Every time I cook, a lesson is learnt… and going forward I’ll remember to use white onions instead of red onions here.  

@ The Apartment - Hoboken, NJ

They need to make this a permanent flavor.  Rocky Road-ish > any other Rocky Road.

@ Ben & Jerry’s - Hoboken, NJ

Good Morning, Western BBQ BK Topper, Crispy Ranch Snack Wrap and $1 Fries.  Individually, you don’t deserve a write-up, but together you gain fast-food Voltron status.  

I do approve of the new BK snack wraps and other recent “innovations”, although I miss the King and BK’s ridiculous ads.  

@ Burger King - Midtown East - New York, NY

Good Morning, Chicken Parm Sandwich.  You represent everything good in this world.

PS - Little Italy makes a mean chicken parm.  Def my go-to in the west vill.

@ Little Italy Pizza and Deli - West Village - New York, NY

Roasted Bone Marrow w/ baguette soldiers and shallot confit and The Black Label Burger  w/ carmelized onions, and pommes frites

@ Minetta Tavern  - West Village - New York, NY

Thoughts: You’re staring at some classy grub right here.  Bone Marrow?  Yea… you heard.  It’s like meat jelly… and while that sounds f’ing disgusting, it was damn good. Kinda makes me wonder why Jello doesn’t venture outside the fruit flavors.  

But… You don’t come to Minetta Tavern for the bone marrow.  You come for the Black Label Burger.  $26 of pure, unadulterated buttery, burger goodness.  I’m not going into the specifics of the meat blend (it’s kinda secret, and that’s what Google is for), but what I will say is that I savored every bite and about half the reason was the price.  

It’s well known that this is an “elite” burger.  The thing is, when food is well documented, highlighted over a variety of mediums and all over the interwebs… the food changes.  It goes from a meal to an event.  Expectations are raised.  Taste buds are refined.  Pictures taken.  Social networks perk up with alerts and notifications.  and it’s cool… everything about food is great (if you disagree with me, you’re probably on a diet).  

But… it kinda disappointed, although only when compared to the incredibly high expectations that I adopted.  Also, each bite cost me a few bucks.  The caramelized onions were a mess, but the bun stood strong and survived (despite being so buttery that it was reminiscent of popcorn).  The meat itself was absolute heaven.  I’m not even going to try and describe it, but I will tell you that it was not enough.  I wanted more, and that’s where some of my disappointment stemmed from.  The pommes frites were nothing to write home about, and the pickle was interesting - sweet and tangy.  It was the color of a new half sour, but was definitely brined a lot longer and in something other than garlic, onions and peppercorn.  

Ultimately, it’s price tag makes it inaccessible to enjoy regularly, which is a key element in “the perfect burger.”  Don’t get it twisted - this meal was really fucking good.  Perhaps, it was just missing an element that’s only recommended for the second try around… a nice slice of cheddar.